Hi. I have just booked some private counselling sessions.?

This is to try and help me with losing my gorgeous fiance to a very sudden suicide 5 months ago and some terrible childhood issues that have now come back to haunt me. I am scared of it, as I don't know how what to expect. I am currently getting bereavement counselling but I am not happy with the lady, as she has been a bit judgemental. I am scared the new counsellor will upset me and I am fairly fragile at the moment. I was just wondering if anybody had been for counselling before, and how they found it? Did it help? Thank you.